Tag: success

Secrets of a Successful Career, by Heather Merrill (Guest Post)

My mother’s wonderful and insightful post about what’s made her career successful. After 20 years of taking care of three little minions (us) full-time, she went back into the workforce and has been on the job for the past 15 years. It’s been amazing to see her overcome challenges and thrive in a demanding career. Here are some of her reflections:

Warning: These are not popular on LinkedIn

Having accumulated a few years of work experience, I’m now reflecting on what leads to a successful career. It’s not always the formulas you read about on LinkedIn. Is a successful career staying at the same company for years, even though you should quit to thrive? Is it never getting fired, laid off or treated unfairly? Is it not having to prove yourself over and over? Is it all about remote work? Does success mean you don’t have to apply for countless jobs or endure rejection? I don’t think so. It’s how you navigate through those inevitable struggles that builds a rewarding and successful career.

Here are eight qualities that can lead to success:

1. Gratefulness: Cultivate gratefulness by getting involved in the lives of others less fortunate than you. Have you spent significant time with anyone who can’t afford an education or who comes from a background with unspeakable hardship? Find a way to rub shoulders with them, whether it’s volunteering for an inner-city non-profit or traveling to another country. A wider perspective cultivates gratefulness.

2. Wisdom: I hear people say they don’t want anyone to tell them what to do, that we should believe in ourselves and forge our own path. They say things like, “I’ll learn to be a parent on my own. Past ways of parenting are outdated.” Frankly, that kind of thinking is foolish. Hasn’t anyone before you learned something valuable? Why would we deny ourselves the treasured insight others have painfully gained? Wisdom is seeking out answers from those who’ve gone before us, and who learned the hard way. Grab every opportunity to gain wisdom.

3. Honesty: This quality has been diluted to the point where we think it doesn’t apply to things that make our lives harder. There are exceptions where we don’t really need to be honest, right? Should we really pretend we’re accomplishing a full-time remote job and yet spend most of our time on a side hustle? Honesty in the short-term can hurt. Yet, having a high level of integrity can take you a long way in your career. You’ll have peace of mind. Success will come to you. Dishonesty always catches up to you. I don’t think anyone gets off easy in the end.

4. Hard work: When each of my 3 kids was around six years old, I taught them to work by rewarding them with small change. They were overjoyed to get that quarter when they worked for me. I kept that motivation going by appropriately rewarding hard work. Later they started a lawn mowing business and worked other jobs during the school year. Pulling weeds and sweating in the hot sun wasn’t beneath them and didn’t make them crumble. Today, they’ve all finished college debt-free, and make their own living. There’s a proverb that says, “A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest and poverty will come upon you like a robber.” (In modern terms that could be gaming, scrolling, binging…) The downhill slide isn’t rare, I’ve seen it happen to people I know…

5. Relationships: No matter how skilled and successful we are, healthy relationships are essential to a healthy life. This means being able to give without requiring anything back. It means inviting people over even when you feel it’s one-sided. It means tuning into the needs of people around you and taking action instead of texting good thoughts. Pepper your day with acts of kindness. What a stress reliever and mood uplifter! You’ll also be surprised to find a great support network is there when you need it.

6. Balance: This is the secret ingredient to succeeding in most everything. Too much work, too much eating, too much alone time, too little exercise, too much talking and not enough listening. The list can go on and on. Evaluate where you can achieve more balance in your life. It might be easing your political dogma, adjusting your spending or even finding a new home for the dogs that wreck your family peace. Whatever it is, balance helps you persevere through the hardest of times. Prioritize what’s important and work towards balance. I’ve seen balance even save a marriage…

7. Purpose: Why do we work? If we don’t have an answer to that, it can lead to a lot of dissatisfaction in our jobs. Take some time out to reflect. Do you work so you can have certain luxuries? Or to give more away? Or because the job itself is intrinsically satisfying? Or because you’ve tied yourself down with debt? Or to better the lives of your family? Whatever it is, be sure your job serves a purpose that means something to your heart. With purpose, what might look menial or trivial on LinkedIn, can be fulfilling and rich to you. Don’t be driven by appearances, but by purpose.

8. Forgiveness: This is very misunderstood. Forgiveness by its own nature is unjust. It’s giving something to someone who doesn’t deserve it & may not have asked for it. Extending forgiveness hurts. So why is it important? Because holding un-forgiveness is personally harmful. It creates negativity, anger, bitterness and other unwanted baggage. Do you want to be a LinkedIn whiner? Longer term, do you want to have an ugliness about you? Forgive the person who fired you. Forgive the company layoff. Forgive the slights and the ghostings. Believe it or not, you’ll find yourself happier. When the next opportunity arises, you’ll be an appealing hire.

If you patiently pursue these qualities, no matter what happens this year, I’ll bet on your success!

You can find her original post HERE.

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Success

When you visualize a successful person, who do you look at? The Wall Street tycoon? The Olympic athlete? The famous actor or actress?

What impresses me about the word success are the many interpretations that allow this word to achieve such a broad meaning. Definitions spring up from a plethora of opinions constructed by unique cultures and environments. Many seem to think it is defined by a level of status, wealth, fame, or comfort.

In my life, on occasion, I am drawn towards these broad definitions, and as I observe much of the media today, success may have the appearance of requiring minimal effort to obtain. “Buy this product and you’ll be a step closer to a happy life”, or “join our organization and you can reach your goals” are just some of the hooks out there vying for our attention.

Success may seem like a short and direct avenue with reward in sight, though once you actually decide to take the path towards accomplishment, the once spacious trail narrows, roots suddenly appear to obstruct the way, and success assumes an evasive nature.

As I’ve learned from my Christian perspective, the definition of success is really quite counter cultural. Success, by most standards is not easy to obtain, and without luck takes substantial effort. To climb the mountain you must train, to get that dream job you need to put in the time and effort to be competitive. To be satisfied in life, many times you need to show humility and defy our self promoting culture.

What defines success to you?

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My buddy Jordan deciding to take the left path on our way back from a camping trip.

 

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Taking Action

 

A little story I think illustrates an important concept:

Many years ago in a distant land there lived a benevolent and wealthy King. He loved his subjects very much and was a fair ruler of his kingdom. Though he had spacious halls lined with gold and silver, his wealth meant little to him, and he gave much of what he had to neighboring empires and the poor. The King remained in peace and enjoyed his rule very much, though soon he would find out that all this was about to change.

You see, no story can be perfect, and as remarkable as this king appeared, he had one weakness. At the very onset of his dominion, he was given a gift to which he owed his power and ability to rule. When he took the throne he was presented with two golden shoes that seemed to capture the very dewdrops of sunlight and radiate them for all to see. Upon slipping the shoes on, the king felt a confidence and leadership that was left unrivaled, and even the mightiest of warriors was humbled in his presence.

So, one morning, much to the king’s dismay, he awoke to find that his precious shoes had been placed too close to the fireplace the night before. The brilliance that they once held, had now faded into singed plainness, and the shoes were no more than any commonly seen in the marketplace outside.

“It cannot be!” cried the king, and he wept in sadness. For the coming days he was quite distraught, and could not speak to anyone, even his closest friends and family. The kingdom quickly began to slip into shadow. Now the king’s advisers and subjects could not let this happen, for all they had seen accomplished was crumbling before their eyes.

It just so happened that two cobblers of reputable status lived within the kingdom. Realizing this, the king’s advisers pleaded with the two men to repair his golden shoes. When both agreed, they decided to give one shoe to each cobbler, hoping this may hasten the repair.

“For the gracious king, I will mend this shoe within two days, and believe me, it will shine even brighter than before,” exclaimed the first, and confidently strutted away with one shoe.

“I will do what I can, and what you request will also be done within two days” said the other, and carried the second shoe away carefully, as if taking a young child in his arms.

The cobblers returned to their homes, thinking hard on how to solve the problem. Soon the sun had chased the moon twice across the sky, and the king’s advisers hurriedly dashed to the cobbler’s shops to obtain the shoes.

Opening the door to the first shop, they found the cobbler fast asleep in his bed. Immediately, they aroused him and asked where the golden shoe was.

“I was just about to repair the shoe, and have drafted a plan that will have it done in five days,” yawned the first cobbler.

“You fool!” they yelled. “How could you say this and not have it done?”

They took the shoe and, shaking the dust from their feet, left the cobbler to return to his sleep.

Hope seemed to fade, and the king was weary, having not eaten nor slept for three days. The advisers rushed to the second cobbler’s house, and were greeted with a spectacular sight. The cobbler, tired from working day and night had not one, but two golden shoes in his hands.

“I did not know what to do right away, but began the repair nonetheless, and realized how to mend the shoes as I worked,” said the second cobbler.

Elated, the advisers returned the shoes to the king, who, upon putting them on, began to jump for joy.

“Where are the two cobblers who did this painstaking task for me?” questioned the king. “I must honor them with a position among my finest noblemen.”

“There is not two, but one man to thank,” said the advisers, and they went away to fetch the second cobbler.

This story is about action. If we say we will do something, we should do it! Complacency is the enemy of success.

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